Despite much critical ribbing, I decided to catch the premiere of LAX last night. (Actually, I watched about half of it before deciding I was too tired, but that's half an hour more than I watched of the Everwood season premiere. And I recorded the whole thing, and watched the remainder this evening.) I want to say there was more to my decision than my ongoing attraction to Heather Locklear, but I can't be arsed to make up a reason right now. And, yeah, the critics haven't been kind, but they had the same lukewarm comments about CSI before it premiered. (Oh, wait. I don't like CSI. Bad example. Anyway...)

So I watched it, and it wasn't all that bad. Not groundbreaking or anything, but pretty watchable. And it's not like by watching it, I'm supporting it over something better, because there's nothing else in that time slot I want to see. So I'll tune in next week.

I think part of the appeal for me is that as far as I'm concerned, airports are Hell on earth. So there is scope for all sorts of mishaps and conflict in that setting, because it's such a site of human misery. I think TV Guide claims it's an attempt to follow in the footsteps of Las Vegas, the show, but I can't watch Las Vegas, because even though it's supposed to be a glamorized fantasy, it's still the place I write on my return address, and the two just don't match up in my head. LAX is a fantasy, too, where an airport only hires the prettiest people, but at least it's a fantasy I'm not supposed to be living down the street from. And it's beautifully produced, and on the Bitchville* Scale, the writing wasn't too horrible.

And, of course, there's the appeal of Heather Locklear.

So, today, because I didn't really feel like working, I checked online for some LAX reviews, just to see what people were saying now that I'd had a chance to judge for myself. And it looks like the critics think the acting is okay, and the show is beautifully shot, but that it isn't a believably realistic depiction of an airport. And all I can say is, "Are you completely friggin' retarded?" No, it's not a realistic view of an airport, any more than The West Wing is a realistic portrait of the White House, or CSI is an accurate crime drama. (Because, you know, evidence techs interrogate suspects all the time...) Anyone who has spent any time at all in a hospital won't have failed to notice that it's a great deal slower paced than seen on ER, and yet nobody seems overly critical of that. So to base the complaints about LAX on this point... I swear, it's like the reviewers of America just don't give a shit about whether people like me have any respect for them. A fiction TV series taking liberties with reality? Imagine that! Next thing you know, you'll be telling me that Fahrenheit 9/11 is actually colored by Michael Moore's political beliefs, and may not present a completely objective picture of reality. Geez...

*The Bitchville Scale of bad dialogue comes from the Nick Nolte/Julia Roberts movie I Love Trouble. The film seems pretty clearly intended to be an homage to the sorts of snappy repartee found in movies like The Thin Man, The Front Page, and pretty much anything with Spencer Tracy and Katherine Hepburn. However, the first serious misstep comes when you notice that the romantic, charming male lead is actually played by Nick Nolte, who more closely resembles a sack of drunken potatoes shoved into a suit. The second misstep comes when the writers fail to realize that having Nolte's character react to Julia Roberts' frosty attitude towards him with witty bon mots like, "Where are you from? Bitchville?" is neither witty nor charming, and is, in fact heavy-handed and irritating. On the Bitchville scale, LAX doesn't necessarily come across like Shakespeare, but it holds its own just fine.